For background, I'm working for the SURYA Foundation, which stands for Survival of Youth and Adolescent. My boss is a gynecologist who began the Foundation with a slew of others to better serve women and children in India, focusing on women's advocacy along with health education, family counseling, career counseling for girls, awareness campaigns, HIV/AIDS education, etc.
The two women I work directly with are both family counselors, both highly educated and progressive and strong, independent individuals. They've given me great insight into gender hierarchy in India and expectations for women, but it's still mindblowing to me to hear about some of the norms and standards that still exist.
One controversial topic right now is about a murder that happened a month ago. A father and his servant conspired and killed his 15 year old daughter, and the mother now is still siding with the father. One of the SURYA staff members explained it like this to me. She said, "In India, everyone still believes the husband is god..." People are appalled that the father did it...and also that the mother is still standing by him. But others support the mother, since she's acting out her traditional wifely duty.
Dr. Sharma, the founder, told me something that also reiterated this concept of a wife's societal expectations. The concept of "marital rape" does not exist in India. A wife, forced by her husband to perform physical, sexual acts, has no protection at all legally or socially, as the rights of the husband in marriage include his wife's sexual submissiveness. India is growing rapidly, economically and otherwise, but it still has a long way to go in terms of basic women's rights to her body and her right to protect it.
My work now surrounds a survey that was developed by a past intern about domestic violence. We've revised it and piloted it with some women, and will continue to do so. My stats and research methods professors would be so proud--we were talking some nice "sample size" and "comparative studies" lingo. That's my PAM education at work, huh?
For the past three days, we've been in Hallomajra, a slum outside of Chandigarh. Everyone is surprised to hear a slum even exists here...but it does indeed.
It brings out a lot of emotions to spend time in a place like Hallomajra, and I am constantly sad and disturbed and then impressed and overwhelmed by the community and camaraderie that exists there. Of course, the children are full of that summer bliss that you can only possess between the ages of 6 and 16, when summer equates freedom and ice cream and all good things (internationally).
They rarely, if ever, see foreigners, so adults and kids alike are curious about what I'm doing and why I'm there...But everyone has been so friendly, offering tea and a seat, their hospitality and the few English phrases they know. Sonia, a 17 year old girl, has become a new friend quickly, even though our conversations are rather limited...she does know, though, that I really enjoyed the chai and samosas she brought for me today.
Right after we got there on my first day, we went to meet the shoestore owner, and sat in the store chatting with him. SURYA partners with various people across the community, and this is how they secure their referrals and spread the name of the organization. Using public places that are run by local community members allows SURYA to be more accepted within the slum as an ally, not an outsider.
So it was in that shoestore that I had my palm read, my head patted by some old Indian ladies, and then where I helped conduct our first interviews of 5 women, between the ages of 17 and 28. Questions including topics of dowry, housework, husband's anger, psychological abuse, in-laws, feelings of self-worth, and more. It is ridiculous to me that I'm here doing this, after spending so much time reading and researching it all last semester.
Oh, I wrote a term paper in May on an education program called SSA for girls in India to combat illiteracy. Today on TV, just on the regular public channel, it flashed the logo of the program SSA, Sarva Shiksha Abhiyan, followed by a load of Hindi. That was a nice little moment of realizing that I am here, doing this, and learning so much more than I ever would have back home.
It was also from that shoestore that I saw this shot, which to me captures India in a single photograph: the poverty, the dust and the heat, children always in corners hiding or peeking out. But also, again, the colors are so present, the vibrant culture and history, the beauty of it all mixed together. This is probably my favorite picture to date, because it's so imprinted in my head. The girls playing on that broken bike as the orange-red sari floated with the wind. Maybe 20 minutes later, the sari flew to the ground and a toddler picked it up, yards of fabric in her small arms. And today, when I was back in that store looking at this exact view, there wasn't anything against the wall. That made me feel like I'd caught a fleeting moment, there one second and then gone again.Maybe tomorrow the sari will be back up on the wall.
