india followed me home

i know my title says the indian summer only lasted until 13 aug, but i think you'll forgive me for writing one more final post. plus, today is india's independence day (and tushar's birthday!) and that deserves props, no?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TUSHAR! (and india...)

it seems that india has followed me home.
i was not happy to leave, i spent the last final hours in delhi trying to soak it up as much as possible. but it surprised me that as we flew over new york city, the golden light on those skyscrapers...i was happy to be home. and i have met/encountered an unreal number of indian people since landing in jfk. maybe i am just paying more attention, or maybe (gasp, manveer!) it's the secret at work. well, probably not.

These gorgeous girls came to say goodbye before my flight. thank you, thank you, thank you everyone who had the chance to stop by--i loved one last roundup in the 37 house--and thanks to those who called as well...it was so sweet. the girls gave me a t-shirt, this one that im wearing, that says, "i'm blessed!" on it, and it couldn't be more true. manveer, mansi, ganda, and megha: i honestly will never forget the drive to the airport, threats of U-turns, and sad english (canadian!) songs. the way you stayed with me up until the very end, and as i turned around, there were your beautiful faces.

in line at security at chandigarh, a blonde woman turned to me and said, "oh! you're from aiesec!" she's not a member, but she knows all about it and told me how she met some people who were going to holland, and she suggested getting in touch with aiesec. yup, i was wearing my "largest club in the world" t-shirt. hah! brand recognition, kids.

evidence that india found its way into my luggage (literally and not) and traveled with me on my way back to the us:
1. on my flight to delhi, i met seo woo, a korean christian filmmaker. (again, for the 4th time, seated next to a religious person--first from la to hong kong, then tel aviv to new york, then denver to frankfurt, then chandigarh to delhi. is this a conspiracy?) he showed me all of his photos of india and we conversed in very broken english, and he translated for me what joe, from south korea, wrote in my goodbye book. he himself wrote something, which joined the throng of multilingual entries.
2. at check-in at delhi, i met three fantastic indian women who were coming to cornell for their MAs in engineering! they were so sweet, and we were on the same flight. we separated after landing in nyc, but ran into each other again at port authority for the cornell bus. we sat together the entire ride up...great girls, i've already gotten invitations to dinner! (thank god, that means my love affair with indian food will continue...)
3. i sat next to a university of michigan math education phd student on the flight back, very nice guy who wanted to know how i felt about geometry. (answer: positively. more than calculus)
4. i watched "life on a metro" on the flight back, a bollywood movie about (surprise!) love. i recommend it, along with tarzan, p.s. i love you, and AUGUST RUSH. which was amazing. i want to watch it again...wow, what a beautiful movie.
5. the customs guy was super nice, asked me where i had been this summer, what i had been doing, he was very curious and gave me such a warm welcome home. i like customs when they are not corrupt/evil.
6. by the time we reached north campus (where i live), there were only two of us left. the driver yelled out to me when we got there, "this is you, angie?!" and i was thinking, "wait, how does he know my name??" turns out the indian girls told him. anyways, we were chatting, and it turns out he lived in mumbai for 2 years and goes just about every summer. we agreed (even though i never visited) that mumbai indeed has beautiful beaches and women (so i hear).
7. as i unpacked, i listened to the CD Sahil made me before i left. it's GREAT, man! thanks so much...you just had to throw in those sappy goodbye songs, didnt you? :)
8. my co-RA anish (we manage a floor together) is indian, spent the summer in goa, and has copies of "om shanti om" and "jaane tu" in his room. i. am. excited. (and he has indian sweets in his room, this was meant to be)
9. we watched the olympics on wed night with anshul and some of his ra friends and ate dried mangoes....from hawaii. and then anish and i argued with dan (who is filipino) over if filipino or indian mangoes are better.
10. at our first day of training, i met an indonesian and promptly said, "kamu ganteng!" as he burst out laughing. i hope that didn't come across the wrong way...i told him two of my best friends this summer are indonesian, too. :)
11. i met alicia, who has studied abroad in india, and gone again for traveling. we talked about the fact that you have to go back. obviously once is not enough....
12. and the coolest person i met yesterday is a girl from jaipur who flipped out when she heard i was in her homeland this summer. we have plans to hang out again sometime, and i'm excited...the entire time we were supposed to be doing this activity, we were talking about india.

this photo is dedicated to nith and kristina, two people who know how to appreciate a proper sunrise or sunset. it isn't a great one, but it's from my window this morning back at school. i thought of you two right away and as cliche as that is, i think its a good thing. if you ever catch a stellar one, i expect photos (cause we all know you two are so on top of that...).

a nice goodbye present from india...that event that @chandigarh put on was, as i said, a HUGE success and got awesome press! you all have no idea how much i smiled when i saw this, to see all of your smiling faces. one last note to the LC: you guys made my experience so, so wonderful, you were there with me every step of the way, only a phone call away...literally. i miss being in the office, seeing you jabbering away on your cells phones outside the door, answering your enthused punjabi hellos, riding into the sunset on your scooters, hugs and high-fives, that mix of so many languages at once in the office. keep up the good @ work, we will back here as well--and we'll get some of you over here, ya? and no joke, 6 years tops, kids, im expecting those wedding invitations.
and no, not because i care about you finding true love.
(just kidding, i care about you, too)

10 things i really love about being home:
1. clean water, out of the tap
2. cornell apples and cornell dining
3. running this morning in the cool, clear, clean air
4. salad. leafy, green, fresh salad
5. real squirrels! not those chipmunk things india calls squirrels
6. moving into a new place
7. calling my parents anytime
8. meeting up with old friends, and making loads of new ones at training
9. fast internet connection
1o. not being stared at

10 things i really miss about india:
1. the trainees, the trainee house, fitting 9 trainees in an auto
2. the @ers and their craziness
3. mangoes. duh.
4. hindi bollywood music everywhere
5. cows
6. being really hot. im actually cold here, it confuses me
7. the ice cream cart guy who trespassed a lot with bountiful offers of ice cream
8. did i say the trainees??
9. the colors
10. the voice of the man selling vegetables in the morning outside our house

some further proof that indians/eps to india/india has followed me home:

1. dharmashala prayer flags: a tribute to that 2nd weekend trip, all the rain, and nithin's stylin', scandalous jeans.
2. letters from all of you guys, so meaningful, and they made me laugh out loud on the plane when i read them. i like how the @ers still find ways to insert "ya" into their writing. and i need a translator for the bahasa!
3. oliphant, sander. made it home safe and sound.
4. kristina, our anklets from agra, in a nice little pile
5. a bag from rishikesh, weekend 1...thivina, thanks, for fronting the 40 Rs to buy it. Natasa, you have the same one, too, i think
6. PAULINE--i miss you, roommate!! (ola, the store is amartex, you must go)
7. my chair has a dupatta.
8. spices and tea bought at my last trip to spencer's with al...
9. megha, mansi, sugunda, and priya--the lovely pink t-shirt
10. chandigarh tourism t-shirt, which makes me pro-style
11. *tear, ganda pants!!! i cinta them.
12. jaipur elephants, from my most favorite city in india, a weekend with incredible people in a beautiful city

so that's my new room, its still missing some things, but most of all...it's missing people. to the trainees: i cant even begin to describe the little things that i miss about living with you all, the constant interaction, cooking together, eating together, walking to the main road, nights out dancing, learning songs, all of our collective laundry hanging on the line, seeing monkeys and camels in the street randomly, spencer's trips, banana shakes, fruit shopping, natasa's fruit salad, chai all the time, with biscuits, ganda's singing, pauline and her hardcore business cards! the roof...

i already made a list of next summer's (anticipated) trip. cant wait to see you guys again, in nyc or elsewhere...and if you're still in hindustan, eps and @ers alike...keep living it. that place is a world of its own.

lots of love and infinite hugs,
angie

12 hours left in chandi

it is 3:17 am and i am tired.
i was compiling photos for a dvd, and its all set and i can go to bed in peace.
today was mayhem--shopping, tea, and cake with natasa, then meeting up with bibha, a close friend and co-worker/supervisor, before we went to ramdarbar to say goodbye to sonia and a few other women. they were so, so sweet--slipping bangles onto my wrists, a mix of hindi and words like "love" and "miss" and "remember." how could i not...
ramdarbar still holds so much beauty in my eyes--scenes i try to imprint in my mind so i wont forget them: a woman in a purple sari, smiling at me over her shoulder, boys sitting on a brick wall flying a kite, a girl in a navy blue school uniform holding one single yellow flower. on and on and i was trying to soak it all up, images and colors and forms and fabrics stored up like in a savings account.
it poured, which made everything trickier. we met two of her friends, ankur and sumit, for lunch. great conversation, funny and easygoing. bibha helped me buy a chapati pan (a tava) after that and we sat in a park and folded paper cranes, a tradition we started on bus rides in the afternoons or evenings coming home.
then packing and that last entry until piyush picked me up and we had dinner at his place with his family--his mom taught me how to make naan at home, which is nothing less than a miracle of innovation. and deliciousness...i love seeing where someone is from, their family and home, their friends, their past.
another hard goodbye before spending the rest of the evening with @ers and interns at mocha, our beloved sofa-infested hangout. so many hugs, rounds of trying to say enough, too much, at once.
its not enough time, to meet people who are so amazing, and have so little time with them before everyone sets off back home. we all signed up for it willingly, but it still sucks.
i am aching inside, i dont feel like its enough. not when you have just begun to feel like a part of a place, like you are potentially useful in a community. and then you have to leave.
im meeting ramesh, another surya staffer, at 10 am to say goodbye, then hanging with the @ers from 12-1:30 before leaving to catch the 3 pm flight to delhi. at 4 pm, ill taxi over to anshul's grandparents' house to have dinner with them and the family, before catching the 1 am flight to nyc.
i knew it would fly by, and it did. im still disappointed i didnt have some ability to slow it all down...

yearbook turkey

one of my best friends, annamarie, claims that i am a yearbook turkey. as in, every year in high school when summer vacation came around, and we passed out yearbooks--i would do the whole, "this is why i appreciate you and what you mean to me..." kind of note for everyone. true, very true. i no longer try to deny this (though i once did). and here's a bit, because it's 6:55 pm the day before i leave india, the house is empty, im writing sugar cubes (notes of appreciation in @ talk. surprise surprise.) and i do feel rather appreciative.

thanks for...

laughing. the eb. past lcps that have become great role models to me (especially tough, independent, smart, sassy female ones who are going off to study and work and live the dream in london!). humoring me by allowing me to take massive amounts of photos. but mainly...for all the laughing, the jokes, the poking fun, the cultural stereotyping amusement we @ers take so much pride in...i love how candid this is (though obviously the matching outfits aren't).

allowing me to be an chandigarh @er. for hours spent under the sun at promotions, talking this organization up. oh, you guys have no idea how much ill miss you, the chats, the whining about prices of mangoes, how you helped me reserve a taxi the night before our shimla trip...

mangoes and cooking in the 37 kitchen with eps. for al and dosas at 10 pm and vanilla ice cream and kheer and feeding ourselves and learning to be self-sufficient (and maintain a semi-balanced diet). for allowing me to be independent in a way i have never experienced before. for showing me how far i can push myself.

the world. more specifically, canada, china, the uk, lebanon, kenya, japan, the us, poland, the netherlands, belgium, indonesia, brazil, south korea, mauritius, and the beautiful people from those beautiful places.

my 37 house family. for pauline and her constant support since day 1, hour 1 for the matter, and her mosquito repellent that has saved my life. nith and his salinger and requests for cycle rickshaws to race each other for more rupees. al and his ability to share meals with me because of our shared interest in food and saving money. ola and her long work hours, but persistent energy and enthusiasm to go out for a cold coffee with the gang. ganda for kata kata kanlah sayung bila binar binar...cinta. and piero for his chinese, his endless fruit supply, his love affair with ozone, and lastly (but not leastly?) his mumbai future.

rare indian sunsets that have taken my breath away. for kristina, her yoga moves, and the rooftop of the house as we jumped around in pure happiness.

al's new girlfriend. enough said.

elephants and art museums. for friends that put up with my silliness and (who knew?) maybe, possibly, even enjoy it (hah! piero, admit it. you think i'm funny...). but you know, mainly for elephants...

countdown (and not happy about it)

sigh.
i cant believe im leaving in two days. right now, its a quiet moment, only myself, piero and al are home since the others have gone to attend a wedding. it's been a fantastic day, im starting to pack, and getting extremely (as in, you have no idea, ridiculously so) reminiscent of my 10 weeks here.
work ended--3 hours of sleep last thursday night to finish my 27 page report of the survey. im proud of my work, and hopeful that i'll be able to use it in the future for something. it was a huge learning experience...i did not mention earlier that i was working with a very difficult woman who, in the end, actually fabricated 70 surveys. my boss doesn't seem to care all that much, and that was beyond frustrating.
it's ironic i suppose that the work experience has for sure confirmed for me my desire to work in this field of women's advocacy--but at the same time, it has shown me such a dark side of how NGOs can be, and i guess generally how low people are willing to stoop to avoid doing work.
tomorrow ill go to ramdarbar one last time to say goodbye to sonia and the other women who have been so good to me.
the past few days have been jam-packed and so much fun and full of seeing people and goodbyes--its nearing the end of the summer and most of us are heading home in time to start classes. we had a dinner the other night with over 20 of us interns, i love this one photo of all of us squished together, so many countries represented! a lot of eating out, goodbye parties, sharing desserts and coffee, photos, plans for future trips to visit each other...
yesterday al and i had a great touristy day in chandigarh. im so glad i decided to stay here for the weekend instead of traveling, it gives me the chance to do all my favorite things and the ones i didnt get to yet. we started the day by going to the chandigarh art museum and gallery.
al was a saint--seriously, i should've warned him about me and art galleries and how much time i take...its funny, piero said that it wasnt that good, just a lot of "old stuff"--but i loved, loved it. great contemporary art, and embroidery, religious art (my favorite!) and bronze hindu sculptures, and traditional indian miniature paintings that i could stare at for hours.
i regret that i didnt buy more art when i was here...then again, i think i always feel like i could've bought more of art, such an investment.
we walked through the zakir rose garden, the largest in asia, but most of the roses aren't in bloom. we appreciated our vanilla and mango popsicles more than the roses. we hit up some shopping, then al went home and i met piero and ganda to watch "Jaane Tu," one of the most recent Bollywood hits. i wanted to see it because there's one song in it that i heard in my friend suhil's car--and it gets stuck in my head at least 10x per day...and i love it.
its awesome watching a movie for three hours in a language you dont understand...im serious! it was very relaxing, i definitely enjoyed the music and admired the gorgeous indian actors and actresses and their abilities to act, sing, and dance.
very typical chic flick (tash, mc, sar...if only you were around), but with a few random bits, like the talking painting and the random desert scenes and cowboys, that made it so unique. what cracked me up even more was how many groups of boys in their late teens and 20's were also there...something that would never fly back home.
ok, if you really want to hear the song i was talking about :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvW4HOKcnPs
the boys humored me and allowed us to go to sagar ratna's for dosas...yum. we came back and didnt do too much, we wanted to find a club but everything was too pricey for us...i journaled, and read, and went to bed.
i was up this morning by 7 am and got ready, made pancakes (heh, with nutella and bananas...) for natasa, ganda, and myself before we headed off to "empower," a youth leadership workshop AIESEC put on for over (!) 400 college students. it was a blast, i always love being a facilitator, and we met loads of awesome, enthused people. my friend piyush spoke about his internship last year in NYC, and another session was put on by a guy from google (honestly, piyush's was much better--he just didn't have freebies). after that, all the @ers and some interns came back to the house and partied and celebrated their success.
i am going to miss these people so much--ive loved living in this house, just upstairs from the office, where i get to see them come in and out all the time. its really like having one gigantic family...today suhil and i had another fantastic conversation (as always) just on the drive home and it makes me feel desperate that i need more time to be here...
i took a nap, not even realizing i needed one, and al and i went to the market right after i woke up. there's a 7-11 type place here called spencer's--we interns frequent it a lot because they have all our essentials. it's small, and all the employees know us by name and country, and are insanely helpful and friendly. i took extra time during this visit to chat with some and they said they hoped i would come back and visit again.
i suppose thats the first of my goodbyes (though i have said goodbye to others, like nith who left a couple days ago, along with kristina), and it was so sad, and we're talking about the guys who sell me shampoo and granola...
al and i made our way to the first restaurant i went to in india, yummy yummy, for mango juice and paneer dosas (again, yum), bought cucumbers and mangoes, and came home and made kheer, rice pudding. we sat under the stars on our terrace and talked, and then al helped me pack, before we dug into our kheer topped with vanilla ice cream and the sweetest, most fragrant mangoes (you sense the pattern here?).
ive had a few tough moments in the past week, there was one afternoon where i was an absolute mess, emotional and illogical and tired. frustrated with work, how much is left to do, how much will be left undone, how much will never get done now that im leaving...i miss home, boulder and cornell, but i dont want to leave india. i dont feel ready whatsoever to leave, im dreading it. matan has gone into training for the next 10 weeks, and it feels like neither of us has gotten time at all to slow down and collect ourselves, separately and together, before jumping into the next stage that awaits. ill arrive in nyc at 6 am on wed, meet beau and annamarie for breakfast, then hop a bus to cornell, start RA training the next morning...
again...WHERE DID TIME GO?
oh, man...i am going to be such a wreck during goodbyes.
ganda is leaving tomorrow morning to spend 2 weeks back in indonesia, so in a matter of hours the series of seriously hard goodbyes begin...
p.s. just from using piero's laptop, ive learned some completely random portugese. im using ola's right now, and all the polish is trickier...think anyone could learn a language this way?

hope and a little laugh

this is a blog entry written by my friend manveer, lcp of @ chandigarh, advocate for love and peace, loyal friend, humble leader and (as i recently learned) a fantastic writer. this entry impresses me like none other, because so many of his words describe exactly how ive felt before...back home and here in india. but with extravagant grace, fludity, as poetry. i already see this entry as words i will refer to when im feeling helpless, hopeless, and a little too glass-half-full.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

I am an optimist but when a child begs me for money, I am sad. Its easy to let go of that, its India, learn to say no, its life long? Or you can really think about changing the world. By making it grow? Create more consumers, to earn profit and then perhaps do CSR, wonderful. Or you can actually do something. But who am I? I just want to find a 'soul-mate', eat, sleep, drink, get rich or atleast die trying. Such is life.

Sometimes you find people you can have a good laugh with, people who understand you, you call them friends (i.e. people culture-ed similarly/super-natural connect?) Anyhow, point being that laughter is good, its full of hope, they give you hope, they tell you white as white and black as, well, mostly black but sometimes white, and you live through the grey areas together, asking questions and dealing with each others 'confusions' (they come in various forms: parents, career, love, etc etc)

Then, there are roles to play in life, oh that is a good one. Of a son, of a colleague, of a student, of a guy, of a leader (co-incidence ignited by AIESEC). They are challenging and exciting and full of learning and expectations and disappointments and I can go on. But at the end of the day, they are roles. They drive you through the day, they also drive you through a certain time of your life, but when you alone at night just before you go to sleep, you ask if this is what you really want to be doing or you feel immensely happy that you are doing what you are doing - depending on how the day has been. But what about all the days put together, all the good ones and the bad ones, and the okay ones, what about life?

I love passion, I don't know if I know what it means, but I have it, I love the individuality it brings, the courage, the excitement, the drive, the utility of time, the insensitivity to what you are non-passionate about! But also it makes you do too much, and in that doing, it can take you off-track, of what really mattered, even, it can change what matters, which I am not too sure of.

Over-all, however, I am hopeful, hope being a strategy, not a plan though. So be it. I am without a plan, and happy as I ever can be (discounting one particular matter which shall change and stop bringing this sinking feeling and only be a source of joy, hope remember?)

a birthday wish to my mom

this is a very love-filled happy birthday to my mom, who is 60, today (in CO, not India...or else I would be a day late!).
see, some people might not want their age declared on the internet by their daughters--but im positive she is ok with it. and that piece of her i respect and admire so much, her confidence in herself and her experiences, and her honesty and openness.

this past monday, i spent a night at my friend kristina's orphanage, ashiana, where she will have her last day tomorrow. ive heard so much from her in the past two months about it--the conditions, the women who run it, and of course the children and how they've completely won her heart. it came as no surprise that these kids totally embraced me (figuratively and literally!) into their lives after i was there for 20 minutes, and wanted to know when i would come again.

dinnertime at ashiana

there are about 60 of them, between the ages of 2 and 14. some are orphans, while some have been abandoned by their parents. it is so evident that they pine for attention and love and care, and all they want is for you to watch them dance or to look at the 5/5 they got on their last homework assignment. it is heartbreaking...

i have never been to an orphanage before. the reaction was so intense, the realization of another aspect of my privileged and blessed life that i took for granted: two parents who love me so, so much, and an entire family that has been by my side my entire life. they raised me, cared for me, made sure i ate well and brushed my teeth, attended parent-teacher conferences at school, took me to piano lessons and art and dance classes, arranged my playdates, hosted my birthday parties, forgave me for my mistakes, instilled in me core values, spoke to me in 2 languages, accepted our differences, gave me a college education, gave me a future, and always believed in me...excessively.

kristina's kids do not have anyone looking out for them in this way--she is trying, in one summer, to do this all to some extent. to remind them to take their baths and to simultaneously inspire them to have confidence to break free from the towering limitations they face. watching her experience this only makes it even more drastic how much i was given in comparison.

my mother is a strong, courageous, and incredibly warm person. she just started a new job this summer, full-time in denver, and she loves it. i've heard people say they they're "too old" to start a new career, that it's "too late" to do something like that. but my mom is living proof that it is never, ever to late to start anew, to chase after new goals, to be active in determining how your own road turns.

with 6 days left in india, i am doing more and more reflecting upon my time here. i feel like last summer was a giant lesson in the worth of education--how hard teaching is, and how much i have been exposed to given my opportunities to learn from all kinds of wise people (some, like dorothy and alice, indeed just have "default wisdom"). this summer, it's been even more eye-opening--showing me how much i never fully appreciated: meals, being able to afford fruits and vegetables, healthcare, access to clean water, pride as a female, freedom to choose who i love, chances and resources to see the world...i suppose it does take coming to a place like this to truly open your eyes. for that, i will eternally be grateful for this summer.

and back to my mom, and my dad-- thank you.

one of my favorite pictures of my mom and me, taken last summer on the 3rd floor balcony of my uncle's house in Taipei

the world's soul and toy trains.

there's that common saying that the journey is more important than the destination--i never took that literally until this weekend (granted, the saying itself was never meant to be literal to begin with...), when seven of us (2 americans, a korean, a chinese, an indonesian, and 2 poles) traveled to shimla, a hill station that once served as the summer vacation of the British Raj (rule) in 1864. below you can see al and our adorable little train.

it started at 3:30 am on sunday when we woke up to catch a 4 am taxi to kalka, then our 5:30 am "toy train" to shimla, 96 km passing through 102 tunnels and 87 bridges. we were promptly served tea and biscuits as the sun rose over the trees, and then a complimentary breakfast a few hours later. fun fact: just on july 2nd, 2008, UNESCO added the Kalka–Shimla Railway to its world heritage list.

we had the entire car to ourselves and enjoyed it thoroughly, taking loads of pictures of each other sticking our heads out of the windows (be careful to watch out for those tunnels) and sneaking in a few hours of napping. i love, love trains--they have fantastic views (especially this one), the atmosphere is just so comfortable, and i feel like i'm going to hogwarts (yes, i did read more of the deathly hallows during breakfast this morning...). it was incredibly breathtaking, the winding tracks and all the towns perched on the edge of the mountain.

shimla itself was very relaxing, the people so friendly as well...you don't even feel like you're in india because of all the british architecture and christian churches scattered about.

i will remember shimla for the following:
1. it was not hot.

2. there were so many monkeys. one jumped on ula's back and stole her glasses and a boy somehow secured them and then demanded 10 rupees for his hard work. anyways, i still found them adorable, especially the babies, even though everyone was tired of them hissing at us.
3. we walked...a lot. to the hindu jakhu temple at the top of one of the mountains (we made the 3 km hike in less than 30 minutes! according to the sign, we are physically fit!), to the state museum, to the christ church on the ridge, to the Viceregal Lodge, a British mansion straight out of some movie.

4. we ate cookies for dinner (chocolate and orange) because we took a regular chair class train back, not a tourist train, and fighting for seats and all that distracted us long enough to forget to buy decent food. al and i made pasta once we got home at 1 am, and it was probably one of the best meals...ever. i dont think i can eat another cookie for quite a while.

5. the dogs in shimla are really lazy and sleep a lot. it's like some conspiracy...everywhere you go, whatever time of day...they're just sleeping. it's a phenomenon.

the train ride back was a blur of cramped necks and attempts to sleep (and cookies) and...reading the entirety of the alchemist in one sitting. i bought it a few days ago, and had only gotten past the first couple pages, so this was a good chance to hit it all up at once. im sure many of you have read it, and liked it, or even loved it as much as i did...maybe it's because of where i am right now in life, but it just struck a chord in me, so deeply and so profoundly. never have i been so reassured by a book that life is ok and it will work out and i will be happy as long as i make the choices, one at a time, that reflect my priorities and values and goals. never has any book made me feel this at peace and content and excited and enthralled about life. that's a lot.

decisions--im excited for decisions and choices and change in my near and far future. i can see why the alchemist was an international bestseller--we all want to feel secure in our futures, to feel like we have direction and reason and purpose. and the book gives you that security, not by telling you what your 'destiny' is, but by laying out a beautifully sweet and simple story of a boy who finds his. he succeeds (triumphs!) amidst a tangle of conflicting desires and dreams, of mishaps and manipulations, of false starts and reconsiderations and doubt and certainty and listening to your heart, and of wise mentors and loyal friends, and even a patient love in the land of deserts and camels (huh, really...).

i finished it, the indian woman next to me picked it up and started to read the back, and then everyone else who was traveling with me started to pass it around and talk about it, and when and where they've seen or heard of it...al and ken both started reading it right after i finished it. i love spreading the reading love.

this picture seems rather future/hope/mystery-filled. props to nithin for calling out on the great lighting.

that was the last weekend trip in india--i leave in exactly one week and i am not at all happy about it. im plenty excited for things that await in the us and at cornell. but i dont know, i honestly dont know, where my summer went and how all this time passed in such a flash. more on that later...i still have my last meeting with my boss on friday and two documents (one survey report, more later on that, and a revised health education packet) to finish up. here we go...

promotions

yesterday we went to one of the colleges in chandigarh to promote @ and help recruit new members--needless to say, it's done quite differently than how we do it at cornell...the focus is not at all on traveling and seeing the world and meeting new cultures as much as it is about working with companies like PWC and Microsoft and building your skill set...i still had a blast, though, especially because of the promotions OC. and yes, i like an excuse to walk up to random strangers and start conversation with them...later in the day, my friend asked me to write something about my @ experience, for an article he's submitting (it's copied below). of course, it highlights the positive aspects of it, and those of you who know me well know that @ last year was not a smooth ride--but an emotional rollercoaster on a weekly basis. nevertheless, this organization has become such a gigantic part of my life...and especially the people i meet through it will definitely continue to be.

Manveer (LCP rockstar), Ridhima, TJ, Harry, Priya, Ragini and me

My favorite quote in high school was, "Think globally; act locally."

Since joining AIESEC, that quote, that mentality for the matter, has been ripped up into little pieces and thrown into the trashcan. Locally? In today's world, with the technology, the internet, and the resources of the 21^st century…there is no reason any of us should stop at national borders. The world is indeed becoming smaller by the minute.

Being a member of AIESEC for two years, experiencing the leadership challenges that I faced, making lifelong friends from every corner of the world, going abroad and spending over two months in India working for women's rights—these opportunities, as trying, frustrating, and unbelievable as they were, have profoundly impacted me. AIESEC has taught me what I love and what I hate, what I believe in and what I question, who I respect and who I don't, and who I am and, more importantly, who I want to become.

This organization is unparalleled in its size and scope. It is by no means perfect, but it provides young people, college students no less, the chance to push themselves to their limits, in a team or as an individual. We work and learn and fail and try and succeed and grow, in hopes of impacting our own character as much as the dynamic between the 190 some countries around us.

waiting

this is 7/7...not bad. i've saved it for last because i felt like it deserved its own space, its own recognition. this might be my favorite photo so far, even though looking at it still makes me ache inside. this is at one of the creches, and the dynamic between this brother and sister was so touching. he relied completely on her--every moment she stepped out the door he would start crying, and in seconds she would be back, pulling him into her lap. they were waiting for the day to end, to go home--but the look in her eyes, the tilt of her head, makes it seem like she's waiting for much more than just that...waiting for the chance to be able to run around, freely, without responsibility, without having to care for another child--waiting for one second when she can do what she wants, not what her brother needs. there is such patience, again the kind i have never seen with children so young. you have to wonder what's going on in her head, if she is imagining something, somewhere, beyond this room with its bare, bare walls.

indian charm

these photos tickle me.
i know that's a very weird phrase to use, but it's the only way i can describe how happy these next 4 pictures make me. they're a random bunch, especially put together, but i think i love them because they represent very peculiar parts of india that i'll miss when i go home. and really, really memorable moments...

the is raju, my friend sonia's little brother, on the bed laughing, and his friend/neighbor with the two doves. i was sitting at their place one day, and this boy just walks in with two doves on him. like it happens every day (oh wait, it does!). they're not even pets, but they might as well be--the boys have spent so much time with them, they're practically trained to do tricks. they were having a blast playing with them--but it made me cringe at moments (raju especially needs to be reminded that they're living creatures...not just paper airplanes). david, if you were in india as a 6 year old, i could definitely see you doing this...

ahhh--after thursday's weekly market in ramdarbar...i stocked up because having an indian woman with you cuts your prices down dramatically. ok, so check it: papaya, cucumbers, apples, green beans, mangoes (2 kinds), onions and pears. guess how much? 77 RUPEES!! (ahem, that is around $2 for everything you see on the table right here)

Mr. Narinder Singh, Guardian Angel of Tourists! Every morning I wait for the bus at a stop 5 minutes away from our house. And this particular morning, Mr. Singh rides up to the stop on his bicycle, hops off, and greets me warmly. Before I even know it, he whips out a photocopied article from The Times of India titled "The Guardian Angel of Tourists," with a photo of himself smack dab in the center. "To hundreds of tourists who come to this city from abroad on a shoe- string budget, meeting Narinder Singh ‘international’ is a blessing...he carries a small writing pad where grateful tourists have showered praise on this good samaritan... and it’s a small paper window to the languages of the world, in hebrew, korean, french, german, japanese, english and in hindi. some have recommended even knighthood for him." i really felt like i was in the presence of a great celebrity--one who was showering me with attention, teaching me hindi words, making sure i knew where i was going. i will never forget how kind he was, with his smile and joking manner, saying, "I am your Indian grandpa, OK?" What an inspirational person, and so representative of India's hospitality. (http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/40739486.cms)

the other morning nithin walks into our room at 5:30 am or something mad like that, and tells me that I have to go outside and see the sunrise. i am incredibly confused because to me it already looks like it's light out--and i mumble something and make my way to the top of the house. we are lucky enough to have easy access to our roof. :) beautiful sunrise, the clouds were remarkable.

A Night at the Golden Temple

our most recent weekend trip--Amritsar. last Sunday morning we left at 5:30 am and arrived by 10. i went with kristina, al and victoria, both of which arrived just days before. we stayed for 24 hours, and it was the perfect amount of time to see everything and relax for a bit. it was crazy hot that day, maybe the hottest i've experienced in india! the travel company was great, we saw tons, and it made me realize how long i've been here. traveling with new people throws it in your how much you've learned--how to bargain, how to give directions (i put words together! i knew how to say "straight" and "a little"--so can you believe that i communicated to our auto driver that we needed to go a little farther forward?!), what to eat, how to deal with people staring at you...

the people of Amritsar LOVE foreigners. i spoke to pauline about this, and she agrees--for some reason, they are even more receptive of foreigners than the usual indian, who is already quite friendly. it was CONSTANT smiles and handshaking and people asking to have their photo taken with us, and (my favorite) people handing you their babies (to hold, to have their picture taken with you and so on). everywhere we went there were people willing to help us out, recommend places to go, point us in the right direction...

people in line to get into the Golden Temple, the Harmandir Sahib--a Sikh temple (or gurudwara). it is known as one of the oldest ones that exist in india.

The Harmandir Sahib is considered holy by Sikhs because the eternal Guru of Sikhism, the Sri Guru Granth Sahib (the holy literature), is housed in the temple. its construction was intended to build a place of worship for men and women from all religions to come and worship God equally... [Photo taken by Sander--it's a beautiful shot]

Really cute baby.

Jallian Wala Bagh--this memorial commemorates the 2000 Indians who were killed or wounded, shot by the British on April13, 1919 while participating in a peaceful public meeting. this was one of the major incidents of India's freedom struggle.

a guard at the Wagha Border, the one shared by India and Pakistan. we were trying to decide if his hat is made to resemble a fan or a peacock (for the record, Nith claims that female peacocks are called peahens...). i swear he noticed i was taking photos of him and thus he was going for the model pose.

as i said, it was deliriously hot, but we were there for over 2 hours. mainly sitting in the blazing sun. and the actual retrieving of the flags didn't that long at all, just a lot of guards walking funny back and forth and chanting. but it was the atmosphere that was so, so cool--it was punjabi rock concert meets military ceremony. we sat on our side with music blaring, women and teenage girls especially dancing like crazy in front of the crowd, cheering and yelling. on the other side, the pakistanis weren't dancing, i think, but definitely cheering, too. it was like the two sides were competing to see who could be loudest...i did join in on the dancing, it was hilarious--these girls are so into it! what a great way to celebrate a country...

it was jam-packed with people, we met a really nice american med student, and a TON of israelis. we sat in the VIP/foreigner section, which was rather amusing in and of itself.

this is the silver temple, a hindu temple also in amristar. very beautiful as well, and there was also music playing inside, loads of flowers and sweet offerings and lights, children running around, singing. i kept on thinking about how this is how religion should be-joyful, celebratory, full of gratitude and exaltation, not guilt and pressure and compensation.

we spent the night at the golden temple...which was definitely memorable. there are hundreds sleeping on the floor, entire families. we slept at midnight, and at 2 am they woke us up to offer rose-scented water. i think a bit later, we had to pick up and move because they were washing down the spot where we were--prayers started at that point, playing over the speakers. then at 4:40 am, one of the Sikh men in full garb (spear included) woke us up again. it was crazy, but there was already a huge line formed outside the temple.

money shot!! (hah, no pun intended, since it is covered in gold) the inside of the temple was really beautiful as well (i feel like im overusing words like beautiful, unbelievable, amazing...), but the reflection really makes it so unique compared to other temples. and cool at night due to the breeze and the water--which counts for a lot in india.

day camp

a different kind of camp than the one us ex-girl-and-boy-scouts are used to, but still lots to do and see...i've described the agp camps already in another entry, but i wanted to include some of the most recent shots i took at them.

natural lighting wins. it ended up with such a red glow, but i really like the contrast of the red tones and her blue salwar suit.

concentrating--especially the girl in the middle, her eyes are so intense.

we interviewed this young mother before we knew she would be in the camp. i honestly think she is one of the most beautiful women i have ever seen--just an incredible smile and it is so evident that she absolutely adores her (adorable) baby girl.

because the camp was held at a school, there were always kids running about. im not nearly as exciting as, say, our blonde-haired, over 6' friend Sander...but still they find me fun enough as a foreigner. these kids were so great, wanting to know my name and giggling loads.

patient baby, waiting for camp to be over.

another young mother. i think there's such grace in her pose, if a little longing. i'm riveted by some of the emotions written on their faces, and i honestly can spend minutes staring at these pictures, trying to figure out what they're saying.

if you noticed, i said earlier i was leaving at 11 am, and it's already 11:30 am now. it's been raining, yesterday and today, so guess what? both the recruitment drive AND the hiv/aids workshop has been postponed. turns out college students rarely, rarely go to class at all when it rains, so...we would have no audience at either.

cornell has a lot to learn from india. i think if we followed suit, i would maybe go to 5% of my classes...

taj mahal, anyone?

so, i suppose my trip in india would not be complete without the documentation of our visit to the taj mahal in agra. to be honest, i didn't have very high expectations--i never do when it comes to this type of thing. you know its going to be cool--but don't ever count on it being life-changing or anything. but it was, as many say, breathtaking and beautiful, and i definitely was at a loss of words for how incredible it was.

it was also an awesome, awesome weekend because my friend kristina and i met up with mitch, teju and amy, friends who are working in chennai for the summer building up an NGO called the shared element. ah--i cant stop telling people how amazing their work is. we had such a great time, messing around, doing cartwheels at the taj, eating mangoes on our rooftop, meeting people, wandering about...

our first view of the taj mahal from the agra fort. there is a ridiculous amount of history and stories and intrigue when it comes to this place and the people who lived there. like sons locking up their fathers (who happen to be emperors...), overthrowing each other, etc. and so on...

also at agra fort. as our tour guide akash described it to us, this one garden encompasses the three great loves of the mughal emperors--also known as the 3 'W's: wine (they grew grapes here), walls (the fantastic architecture), and women (you are viewing the remnants of an ancient brothel). i laughed for quite a while when he told us this...

ta-dah!! we went in the afternoon, and it was packed--right up until it closed. ok, yeah, it peeved me that the foreigner rate is 750 Rs and the Indian rate is like 20...but it was, of course, worth it. i wasn't so taken by the size or the value of the marble and all the semi-precious stones inlaid into it as much as i was impressed by the time, effort, detail, concision, and thought put into it. It combines Persian, Turkish, Indian and Islamic architectural styles--I wasn't expecting to see Arabic all over the Taj, but it was gorgeous. The building and surroundings are perfectly symmetrical...perfectly.

Amy, I hope you're not going to sue me for this, but I'm going to quote you here because you did the best job ever summarizing the best parts of the taj. here, to be super clear, this was written by amy jackson, one of the most lovely people i've ever met, with (truly) the voice of an angel and a personality to match:

"There's perfect symmetry over the entire 5-acre plot or however big it is, and the domes are mathematically perfect, and the minarets lean outward just enough to not destroy the center in event of an earthquake, and there are optical illusions in the stonework (PS, we got to visit the workshop of the guys whose great-great-400-years-and-fourteen- generations-ago-great grandfathers did the original stonework... they're not only still doing that stone inlay work, they're still using the same mortar recipe!) and the garden is laid out according to some Quoranic passage..."

We saw the Taj...yes we did! Hooray! (And Happy 21st Birthday, Mitch!!)

This is on one side of the Taj, a mosque I believe (the other side is the exactly the same, but instead it's a guest house). We made a huge effort to be there at sunset, and it was well, well worth it. I think we spent at least an hour just sitting out by the building, admiring every aspect of it possible.

the next day we took a short detour to Fatehpur Sikri, the abandoned capitol of king akbar. but due to water shortages, they only lived there for less than 10 years before shifting to agra fort. the architecture itself resembled agra fort and the red fort in delhi, so it wasn't that exciting. but the ruins like this one were unbelievable, you could explore every turn and corner to your heart's content (while being careful of some crazy drop-offs). you can see my friend kristina on the upper right hand corner, as tiny as she is!